This is going to be a controversial post perhaps. I'm not meaning to stir up any drama. I have just started realizing some societal "norms" that should NOT be normal. One of them is exactly this: Facebook is becoming a Brag Book. It is a way you can prove yourself to your family, friends, etc. All of it is in the top part of your Facebook Account-- your profile picture which should be posed just perfectly, your name which should have changed by now if you're a female (according to society's standards), your job which should have changed by status by either being more prestigious/accomplished or your job could become "SAHM."
Here's the thing, I'm not trying to be rude. I know that I have been GUILTY GUILTY GUILTY of all these things. I change my profile picture once a week probably. I wonder if I do that though so that I can prove myself to others--so that I can prove that my life is fun and satisfying? I feel like because of the tremendously big thing that Facebook has turned into, it hasn't been just pretty photos of girls at college parties anymore, it's a STATUS SYMBOL. We are supposed to look like we have the perfect life. Well, you know what? We don't. Behind your name and your perfectly posed profile picture, every single person is flawed. We all have imperfections. Maybe we try to make our Facebook appear perfect so that we can feel better about ourselves or the choices we've made? I'm not sure. Whatever it is, it is hurting a lot of WOMEN in particular.
We have been raised in a relatively modern society where we are expected to have a pretty significant career, but along with that, we are expected to get married AND have babies, all before the age of 30. Well, what happens when certain people don't accomplish all these things by or before 30? We are questioned over and over again by perfectly kind people who mean absolutely NO harm. But, here's the thing, ignorance is bliss, but I no longer want women to be ignorant to what they're doing to other women. How are we ever supposed to be seen as equal to men if we are so caught up in our petty comparisons and trying to measure our worth by a silly Facebook picture or our statuses?
Society historically has treated women as if they all want to be a Stay at Home Mother someday. Well, not all of us want that. I, personally, DO want that. I am one of the few who want to give up her career completely and be a full time MOM. You know that only about 10% of mother's do that now? I am okay with being in the minority, it's something I've long dreamed about--since I was a child, and then all my passions and interests in college lined up with that. I love to teach art to children. How much better will it be when it's my own child?
Anyways, we need to treat each other better, women. I'm speaking directly to YOU because you know that it's true. I was friends with guys primarily until getting married to Andrew. I decided once I got married to ditch my guy friends and only be friends with girls (or Andrew's guy friends who we hang out in groups). In this new lifestyle change from being a "guy's girl" to a "married girlie girl" I have noticed a significant change in EVERYTHING-- from the way I am treated by other girls, to the way I try to make friends (people Andrew would be friends with possibly?), and I am noticing how terribly women treat each other. I was friends with probably hundreds of guys before settling down (only dated a few of them) and I can tell you from experience that I was never treated so judgmentally. No guy ever said "your eggs are drying out", okay, except ONE time, and he said it completely sarcastically, as if implying that all of our female friends were so concerned with that all the time (if you read this, Ryan, you will feel bad).
This is the end of my rant. And, yes, I will be a "SAHM" someday but I really pray that I will be completely humble about it all and not boast in my blessings. I know that I've probably done that with everything else--my traveling for sure! Maybe in my marriage, but not as much as my traveling (I was obsessssssed). I really hope that someday when I announce my pregnancy that I will not stir up any hard feelings, I will be as sensitive to others as I can be. There is no reason to boast in the miracle of childbirth for that is something entirely of God. We have no part in that really.
The end!
Thursday, May 8, 2014
Saturday, April 5, 2014
Marriage Thus Far.. (Almost Not Newlyweds!)
Here are some pics from the past year:
Looking back on my real, true years of being "single"-- six years in Houston, I really truly did live out my single years in the fullest of ways. I worked at a Montessori preschool starting off, then did five years in public schools teaching art to PK-12th grade! Through my awesome teaching schedule with summers off, I spent every cent of my hard-earned salary on traveling the world. I traveled in every single way possible--selfishly with my girl and guy friends (the best trips being to Madrid, Paris and Barcelona with Jmay & Matty D and to NYC with Matty D, Clare, Nicole and Kelly) and then Unselfishly (although, everyone has to admit there are unfortunately selfish desires deep down) through Missions to Belize, China, Mexico and Honduras. Both my career and my traveling were very fulfilling. Well, at least they should've been.... I was going through immense grief during all of that time, and honestly, the places I went were amazing and all, but I'd get there and say to myself: "where you go, there you are." That basically means, the grief travels with you! I don't want to get into grief though, because I spent a large part of my last post talking about that (so click backwards if that's what you want to read about). Being single, all in all, was the truest learning and growing experience. Everyone needs to be single to find out who they really are.
Andrew is a very strong and compassionate person! He is truly the best person for me, in that he understands and knows me VERY well (after 14 years of dating/marriage he should know me well). He knows when I am starting to feel tiny bouts of grief over my dad, or just grumpy or moody, or on the more positive side--when I'm just full of life and happy, or feeling super adventurous and wanting to travel everywhere! He knows when I'm needing more depth in my spiritual life seeking Christ!!! Thankfully, we are similar in many of these feelings. Two weekends ago we both admitted we felt our spiritual life seeking a deeper relationship with God was really lacking. We have had the unfortunate events of not one, but two pastors (actually three, if you include the music pastor) stepping down from leadership at a small church plant we both love here in Austin--all within the past two years while I've been trying to move and plant roots here in town.
Well, to progress on-- we've discovered a new church that meets at the same location as the other church on Sunday mornings instead of at night. It seems like a really thriving and vibrant church that doesn't seem to be going anywhere except growing and getting bigger--maybe even outgrowing the building they are currently occupying! I guess after coming from a church group in Houston that just recently ended, I don't want to be newly part of a church that could possibly stop meeting, and instead want to enter into a vibrant community! So, for now, we are visiting and taking our time one Sunday at a time. We will check it out for the second time tomorrow. I'm glad we have been able to visit two Sundays before Easter and during Lent because I feel like this season in a church is a very beautiful and transformative time. I didn't personally give up anything for the Lenten season because usually I give up Facebook and this year we are eagerly anticipating the arrival of our new niece, Charlotte Grace and Casey (her mom!) updates constantly on her pregnancy--and I don't want to miss a single thing!!! Anyways, I will probably be giving up social media in May so that I can continue to see Charlotte updates right after she's born!
Anyways, these are some of the new things going on in our life and about our marriage. We have a wonderful married life, and as we get closer to our two year anniversary I am feeling tremendously blessed to have such a wonderful husband! I will try to write a bit more in the coming months!
Tuesday, December 31, 2013
A blog about turning 30..
Everyone writes a blog about turning thirty. Well, a lot of my friends have at least. I haven't written a blog entry since May of 2011! I feel like so much has happened since that time, two years and seven months later. Even more has happened since December of 2003 when I turned a mere twenty. I feel like I need to write about an entire decade. The ten years of my twenties were where I slowly and gradually, albeit somewhat painfully transformed from a naive and carefree girl to a much more wise, most of the time confident woman.
The first three years of my twenties were perfect it seemed. I lived in San Marcos, the most ideal and picturesque college town in the Texas hill country where a crystal clear river runs through the college campus. I was immersed in Art and Design classes and took the occasional Scuba, Tennis or Dance class. My college life was definitely not stressful. I was supremely blessed to be majoring in Graphic Design and not have to work part time jobs to put myself through (thanks to my hard working parents!). Also, I had my high school sweetheart boyfriend of four years down the road in Austin. I imagined graduating college, moving to Austin, getting married at twenty-two and having a family by my mid-twenties after teaching art for a few years. God had a different plan that was much bigger than Andrew & I and our little ideas for our lives.
At twenty-two, I had a graphic design internship right out of college in Austin and was fired from it! Who gets fired from an internship? Well, apparently it happens. I took it as a sign that I shouldn't do graphic design. I didn't really enjoy it anyways. Sitting at a computer all day was not my cup of tea. I moved home to Houston immediately (it was August of 2006) with the goal of becoming an Alternatively certified art teacher. I had worked at a summer camp teaching art to kids through a church and loved it. I wanted to change lives through art. I had a plan to stay in Houston for one year while getting certified and working at a private Montessori preschool, then move back to Austin for Fall of 2007. Well, who knew one year in Houston would turn into six years?
My dad was diagnosed with Stage 4 Colorectal Cancer that had metastasized to his liver in December of 2006. My parents didn't tell us this, but I guess the twenty two year old version of me was pretty wise, and could tell that all of those scientific words strung together equalled a bleak future, also known as a "death sentence." I straight up researched online "stage 4 colorectal cancer life expectancy." All the webpages said twelve months. I was very realistic and knew the next year would probably not end well. I never told my parents that I had researched this and remained somewhat hopeful through their hopes. My dad was extremely positive and never once mentioned that he was given a "death sentence", instead he clung to his faith and the fact that God has healed countless others through miracles. I wish that I had been as hopeful as he was sincerely, but deep down I just knew I needed to prepare spiritually for the worst. Unfortunately, I don't think I ever was prepared for the day he passed away, which was February 17, 2008. That day forever changed me and my entire makeup.
In the months prior to his death a lot of life changing things happened. Andrew moved from Austin to Houston to be with me while he died, and honestly from that moment I knew Andrew would be my husband someday. Evan finished his first semester of college at Texas A&M and I had started my first public school art teacher job. Everyone was living their lives as fully as possible and even though there was a severely huge and grief soaked "elephant in the room", we tried to not dwell on the fact my dad was soon dying. When the doctors at MD Anderson finally said there was nothing else they could do, two weeks prior to his death, we finally acknowledged as a family that this was really happening. We let the grief come into our home as my dad peacefully passed away. The day and weeks following his death were actually the most peaceful times. God granted us some sort of surreal peace for that time. It wasn't until months later that the grief took a harder turn, at least for me.
I was mostly numb. For some reason it was hard for me to cry. When I was finally able to cry, it came up in wailing tears, and I physically had symptoms from the grief. At about a year out from his death, the grief was so bad that it manifested itself in anxiety, trouble eating and stomach issues. I had decided to live at home a year after his death to be with my mom and at the end of that year I got an apartment down the street from her. I just couldn't imagine moving far away from her yet. So, here I was in 2010 finally, two years out from my father's death, still in the midst of my grief and I had broken up with Andrew a few months prior. I finally made a conscious decision in February of 2010 to just be done feeling sorry for myself and continuing my grief. I planned to go on a mission trip to China and I felt that I would be over my grief and ready to fully live by then (and make a decision about whether to get back together with Andrew or not). From the fall of 2010 to spring of 2011, I feel I was able to finally truly heal and move on from the weight of the grief. I finally decided to just commit to Andrew and trust that he and I would finally get married. He proposed in December of 2011. God had finally brought my life full circle, and I was preparing to move to Austin and finally be married to the one whom I wanted to be married to in Austin six years prior. I guess God just had some breaking down and readjusting to do in my heart.
Although I know the grief is still there, it does not consume me or make me feel sick. I know life is going to have it's ups and downs. I am currently living in the happiest and most settled time of my life, but I know all too well that the sudden loss of a loved one can change that feeling all too easily. I have learned that you need to take life one day at a time and be truly grateful each day for everyone you have in your presence. All the people who are in my life make me a stronger and better person, but I also know that ultimately, your strength comes from God and you need to lean into Him more than anyone else. Every other relationship in your life can come and go, but your relationship with God lasts forever. He will never leave your side. Even though my dad didn't intentionally leave me, sometimes it felt like it. I think these are important lessons to learn before marriage, at least for me, because now I don't cling so tightly to Andrew. I know that he adds strength and beauty to my life, but I know that my relationship with him should come second to my relationship with God. Andrew and I can build each other up, but we should be building each other up to ultimately reach God.
We got married August 11, 2012 and it's amazing to see how much I learned between February 17, 2008 and then. Five and a half years of immense change and transition. Now I'm thirty and have been married almost a year and a half. I feel like I am a much more mature woman, ready to face everything my thirties brings. Hopefully it brings a couple pregnancies and children, but I am enjoying however long Andrew and I have together as "just us." I have been blessed in my life and am filled with so much gratitude for all that God has given me.
Here's to 2014, and being THIRTY!!!
The first three years of my twenties were perfect it seemed. I lived in San Marcos, the most ideal and picturesque college town in the Texas hill country where a crystal clear river runs through the college campus. I was immersed in Art and Design classes and took the occasional Scuba, Tennis or Dance class. My college life was definitely not stressful. I was supremely blessed to be majoring in Graphic Design and not have to work part time jobs to put myself through (thanks to my hard working parents!). Also, I had my high school sweetheart boyfriend of four years down the road in Austin. I imagined graduating college, moving to Austin, getting married at twenty-two and having a family by my mid-twenties after teaching art for a few years. God had a different plan that was much bigger than Andrew & I and our little ideas for our lives.
At twenty-two, I had a graphic design internship right out of college in Austin and was fired from it! Who gets fired from an internship? Well, apparently it happens. I took it as a sign that I shouldn't do graphic design. I didn't really enjoy it anyways. Sitting at a computer all day was not my cup of tea. I moved home to Houston immediately (it was August of 2006) with the goal of becoming an Alternatively certified art teacher. I had worked at a summer camp teaching art to kids through a church and loved it. I wanted to change lives through art. I had a plan to stay in Houston for one year while getting certified and working at a private Montessori preschool, then move back to Austin for Fall of 2007. Well, who knew one year in Houston would turn into six years?
My dad was diagnosed with Stage 4 Colorectal Cancer that had metastasized to his liver in December of 2006. My parents didn't tell us this, but I guess the twenty two year old version of me was pretty wise, and could tell that all of those scientific words strung together equalled a bleak future, also known as a "death sentence." I straight up researched online "stage 4 colorectal cancer life expectancy." All the webpages said twelve months. I was very realistic and knew the next year would probably not end well. I never told my parents that I had researched this and remained somewhat hopeful through their hopes. My dad was extremely positive and never once mentioned that he was given a "death sentence", instead he clung to his faith and the fact that God has healed countless others through miracles. I wish that I had been as hopeful as he was sincerely, but deep down I just knew I needed to prepare spiritually for the worst. Unfortunately, I don't think I ever was prepared for the day he passed away, which was February 17, 2008. That day forever changed me and my entire makeup.
In the months prior to his death a lot of life changing things happened. Andrew moved from Austin to Houston to be with me while he died, and honestly from that moment I knew Andrew would be my husband someday. Evan finished his first semester of college at Texas A&M and I had started my first public school art teacher job. Everyone was living their lives as fully as possible and even though there was a severely huge and grief soaked "elephant in the room", we tried to not dwell on the fact my dad was soon dying. When the doctors at MD Anderson finally said there was nothing else they could do, two weeks prior to his death, we finally acknowledged as a family that this was really happening. We let the grief come into our home as my dad peacefully passed away. The day and weeks following his death were actually the most peaceful times. God granted us some sort of surreal peace for that time. It wasn't until months later that the grief took a harder turn, at least for me.
I was mostly numb. For some reason it was hard for me to cry. When I was finally able to cry, it came up in wailing tears, and I physically had symptoms from the grief. At about a year out from his death, the grief was so bad that it manifested itself in anxiety, trouble eating and stomach issues. I had decided to live at home a year after his death to be with my mom and at the end of that year I got an apartment down the street from her. I just couldn't imagine moving far away from her yet. So, here I was in 2010 finally, two years out from my father's death, still in the midst of my grief and I had broken up with Andrew a few months prior. I finally made a conscious decision in February of 2010 to just be done feeling sorry for myself and continuing my grief. I planned to go on a mission trip to China and I felt that I would be over my grief and ready to fully live by then (and make a decision about whether to get back together with Andrew or not). From the fall of 2010 to spring of 2011, I feel I was able to finally truly heal and move on from the weight of the grief. I finally decided to just commit to Andrew and trust that he and I would finally get married. He proposed in December of 2011. God had finally brought my life full circle, and I was preparing to move to Austin and finally be married to the one whom I wanted to be married to in Austin six years prior. I guess God just had some breaking down and readjusting to do in my heart.
Although I know the grief is still there, it does not consume me or make me feel sick. I know life is going to have it's ups and downs. I am currently living in the happiest and most settled time of my life, but I know all too well that the sudden loss of a loved one can change that feeling all too easily. I have learned that you need to take life one day at a time and be truly grateful each day for everyone you have in your presence. All the people who are in my life make me a stronger and better person, but I also know that ultimately, your strength comes from God and you need to lean into Him more than anyone else. Every other relationship in your life can come and go, but your relationship with God lasts forever. He will never leave your side. Even though my dad didn't intentionally leave me, sometimes it felt like it. I think these are important lessons to learn before marriage, at least for me, because now I don't cling so tightly to Andrew. I know that he adds strength and beauty to my life, but I know that my relationship with him should come second to my relationship with God. Andrew and I can build each other up, but we should be building each other up to ultimately reach God.
We got married August 11, 2012 and it's amazing to see how much I learned between February 17, 2008 and then. Five and a half years of immense change and transition. Now I'm thirty and have been married almost a year and a half. I feel like I am a much more mature woman, ready to face everything my thirties brings. Hopefully it brings a couple pregnancies and children, but I am enjoying however long Andrew and I have together as "just us." I have been blessed in my life and am filled with so much gratitude for all that God has given me.
Here's to 2014, and being THIRTY!!!
Tuesday, May 10, 2011
Good quotes about Postmodern vs. Modern thought..from "A New Kind of Christian" by Brian McLaren
First, let's start with the quote that starts it all, from C.S. Lewis' "The Discarded Image." This talks about how the Medieval beliefs were ALL flipped upside down with the discovery that the Earth rotates around the sun..instead of the opposite, fundamental beliefs everyone accepted as truth: there being concentric spheres that all ascended from the Earth and moved in a "cosmic dance" creating harmonious music; symbolic of the harmony of God's creation. This discovery by Copernicus and later Galileo traded an old model of reality for a new one, and had real costs associated with it. This quote shows what was at stake in trading in the old worldview for a newer one.:
"In our universe (the earth) is small, no doubt; but so are the galaxies, so is everything--and so what? But in theirs there was an absolute standard of comparison. The furthest sphere, Dante's maggio corpo, is, quite simply and finally, the largest object in existence....Hence to look out on the night sky with modern eyes is like looking out over a sea that fades away into mist, of looking about one in a trackless forest--trees forever and no horizon. To look up at the towering medieval universe is much more like looking at a great building. The 'space' of modern astronomy may arouse terror or bewilderment or vague reverie; the spheres of the old present us with an object in which the mind can rest, overwhelming in its greatness but safisfying in its harmony....Pascal's terror at le silence eternel de ces espaces infinis (the eternal silence of the infinite spaces) never entered his mind. He is like a man being conducted through an immense cathedral, not like one lost in a shoreless sea."
(so, based on this quote- imagery that goes with these ideas: Medieval Universe- looks like a towering cathedral; has harmony; spheres moving around Earth in a cosmic dance... Modern Universe (what we have today)- sea that fades away into mist; no harmony; earth rotates around sun... you can see how for the Medievals this would make them "spiritually homeless". The new model was less personal, less orderly, etc..)
Quote by Brian McLaren (via Neo-his fictious character):
"Most modern people love to relativize the viewpoints of the others against the unquestioned superiority of their own modern viewpoint. But in a way, you cross the threshold into postmodernity the moment you turn your critical scrutiny from others to yourself when you relativize your own modern viewpoint. When you do this, everything changes. It is like a conversion. You can't go back. You begin to see that what seemed like pure, objective certainty really depends heavily on a subjective preference for your personal viewpoint."~Brian McLaren's character, Neo in the book "A New Kind of Christian"
The next quote is, again, from C.S. Lewis' "The Discarded Image"..
"It would...be subtly misleading to say, 'The medievals thought the universe to be like that, but we know it to be like this.' Part of what we now know is that we cannot, in the old sense, 'know what the universe is like' and that no model we can build will be, in that old sense, 'like' it....There is no question here of the old Model's being shattered by the inrush of new phenomena. The truth would seem to be the reverse; that when changes in the human mind produce a sufficient disrelish of the old Model and a sufficient hankering for some new one, phenomena to support that new one will obediently turn up. I do not at all mean that these new phenomena are illusory. Nature has all sorts of phenomena in stock and can suit many different tastes."
My brain is going in all kinds of directions now with these ideas of Postmodernity..and what Modernity, in fact, is. Postmodernism isn't a BAD thing- it's actually a viewpoint that is emerging based on our evolving/ever-changing world. We can't be like the Medievals and just accept EVERYTHING the way we were brought up to believe- we need to challenge our preconceived notions..
"In our universe (the earth) is small, no doubt; but so are the galaxies, so is everything--and so what? But in theirs there was an absolute standard of comparison. The furthest sphere, Dante's maggio corpo, is, quite simply and finally, the largest object in existence....Hence to look out on the night sky with modern eyes is like looking out over a sea that fades away into mist, of looking about one in a trackless forest--trees forever and no horizon. To look up at the towering medieval universe is much more like looking at a great building. The 'space' of modern astronomy may arouse terror or bewilderment or vague reverie; the spheres of the old present us with an object in which the mind can rest, overwhelming in its greatness but safisfying in its harmony....Pascal's terror at le silence eternel de ces espaces infinis (the eternal silence of the infinite spaces) never entered his mind. He is like a man being conducted through an immense cathedral, not like one lost in a shoreless sea."
(so, based on this quote- imagery that goes with these ideas: Medieval Universe- looks like a towering cathedral; has harmony; spheres moving around Earth in a cosmic dance... Modern Universe (what we have today)- sea that fades away into mist; no harmony; earth rotates around sun... you can see how for the Medievals this would make them "spiritually homeless". The new model was less personal, less orderly, etc..)
Quote by Brian McLaren (via Neo-his fictious character):
"Most modern people love to relativize the viewpoints of the others against the unquestioned superiority of their own modern viewpoint. But in a way, you cross the threshold into postmodernity the moment you turn your critical scrutiny from others to yourself when you relativize your own modern viewpoint. When you do this, everything changes. It is like a conversion. You can't go back. You begin to see that what seemed like pure, objective certainty really depends heavily on a subjective preference for your personal viewpoint."~Brian McLaren's character, Neo in the book "A New Kind of Christian"
The next quote is, again, from C.S. Lewis' "The Discarded Image"..
"It would...be subtly misleading to say, 'The medievals thought the universe to be like that, but we know it to be like this.' Part of what we now know is that we cannot, in the old sense, 'know what the universe is like' and that no model we can build will be, in that old sense, 'like' it....There is no question here of the old Model's being shattered by the inrush of new phenomena. The truth would seem to be the reverse; that when changes in the human mind produce a sufficient disrelish of the old Model and a sufficient hankering for some new one, phenomena to support that new one will obediently turn up. I do not at all mean that these new phenomena are illusory. Nature has all sorts of phenomena in stock and can suit many different tastes."
My brain is going in all kinds of directions now with these ideas of Postmodernity..and what Modernity, in fact, is. Postmodernism isn't a BAD thing- it's actually a viewpoint that is emerging based on our evolving/ever-changing world. We can't be like the Medievals and just accept EVERYTHING the way we were brought up to believe- we need to challenge our preconceived notions..
Wednesday, April 20, 2011
Interesting factoid from here (about Copenhagen Clocktower-most complicated clock): http://home.comcast.net/~davidriggs01/ps19-1.htm
Thanks, David Riggs..Illustrations for Preaching & Teaching...
"The heavens declare the glory of God; and the firmament shows His handiwork. Day unto day utters speech, and night unto night reveals knowledge." (Psalm 19:1-2)
In the town hall in Copenhagen stands the world's most complicated clock. It took forty years to build at a cost of more than a million dollars. That clock has ten faces, fifteen thousand parts, and is accurate to two-fifths of a second every three hundred years. The clock computes the time of day, the days of the week, the months and years, and the movements of the planets for twenty-five hundred years. Some parts of that clock will not move until twenty-five centuries have passed.
What is intriguing about that clock is that it is not accurate. It loses two-fifths of a second every three hundred years. Like all clocks, that timepiece in Copenhagen must be regulated by a more precise clock, the universe itself. The universe, a mighty astronomical clock, with billions of moving parts, rolls on century after century with movements so reliable that all time on earth can be precisely measured against it.
Not gonna elaborate on this..God's knowledge is definitely AMAZING! :)
"The heavens declare the glory of God; and the firmament shows His handiwork. Day unto day utters speech, and night unto night reveals knowledge." (Psalm 19:1-2)
In the town hall in Copenhagen stands the world's most complicated clock. It took forty years to build at a cost of more than a million dollars. That clock has ten faces, fifteen thousand parts, and is accurate to two-fifths of a second every three hundred years. The clock computes the time of day, the days of the week, the months and years, and the movements of the planets for twenty-five hundred years. Some parts of that clock will not move until twenty-five centuries have passed.
What is intriguing about that clock is that it is not accurate. It loses two-fifths of a second every three hundred years. Like all clocks, that timepiece in Copenhagen must be regulated by a more precise clock, the universe itself. The universe, a mighty astronomical clock, with billions of moving parts, rolls on century after century with movements so reliable that all time on earth can be precisely measured against it.
Not gonna elaborate on this..God's knowledge is definitely AMAZING! :)
Just some thoughts based on an e-mail I sent a friend...(we've been having a discussion about faith via e-mail/facebook, etc..)
Hey Mina,
I read this verse today, and I read it in a different way, b/c of the comments you wrote on my wall!! :) I never really focused on the word "knowledge" in this verse, but now I see it in a whole new light!! :) All the things we see in this beautiful creation, well, nature specifically (not things flawed humans have created), are ways for us to KNOW God exists. We can learn more about Him and His character through these things... how He lovingly cares for all plants and animals..and they were each made SO beautiful- we can know that He will take care of us, as well. :) And even in studying these things in the academic sense, in Science- we have KNOWLEDGE right there in our hands, that God exists..I can't even imagine rejecting God if you know the complexities of nature..
Here's the verse (it's a popular one, but seeing it differently ONLY b/c of the word "knowledge"..WOW!):
"The heaven's declare the glory of God; the skies proclaim the work of his hands. Day after day they pour forth speech; night after night they display knowledge." -Psalm 19:1-2
Anyways, I think maybe you're right- that knowledge is a starting point for faith, but I think that ultimately, your HEART is what makes you believe. :) B/c these scientists, with all their knowledge, have everything it takes to believe, but they don't have the faith in their hearts. :) So, you're right that it's a combination of heart, soul and mind. :)
Well, love ya, ttyl!
~Audrey
Mina has spoken some wisdom into my heart..and made me see things in a new light. :) I always just saw my acceptance of Christ as a heart-action, and never really saw how knowledge was a part of it. I mean, it doesn't seem very logical to believe in God, and a human being sent down from Heaven to be God's son. I mean, all of these things aren't very logical to me. But, I think what I have come to find, is that- you definitely CAN have knowledge as part of the faith journey. Knowledge that this beautiful world around you was created, miraculously, by a flawless being. Yes, we humans can really screw things up, but ultimately, everything keeps flowing and cycling on. The world doesn't end just because we screw up. People die, wars happen, and we are destructive and violent and sinful, but God keeps this world going and going, and He helps restore everything and brings peace to our hearts, after all this horrible stuff. We are able to come to Him humbly, and thank Him for everything- even the pain and suffering, because ultimately, these horrible things only bring us closer to Him. They make us turn to Him, and weep at His feet, and pray He will heal us. There will be healing rivers in Heaven..Eden will be restored. Here is the verse I recently read:
Revelation 22:1-5
Eden Restored
1 Then the angel showed me the river of the water of life, as clear as crystal, flowing from the throne of God and of the Lamb 2 down the middle of the great street of the city. On each side of the river stood the tree of life, bearing twelve crops of fruit, yielding its fruit every month. And the leaves of the tree are for the healing of the nations. 3 No longer will there be any curse. The throne of God and of the Lamb will be in the city, and his servants will serve him. 4 They will see his face, and his name will be on their foreheads. 5 There will be no more night. They will not need the light of a lamp or the light of the sun, for the Lord God will give them light. And they will reign for ever and ever.
I love this verse!
Well, off I go to get some work done! :) I'll try to start blogging again..gradually..haha! :) Have a good one~
I read this verse today, and I read it in a different way, b/c of the comments you wrote on my wall!! :) I never really focused on the word "knowledge" in this verse, but now I see it in a whole new light!! :) All the things we see in this beautiful creation, well, nature specifically (not things flawed humans have created), are ways for us to KNOW God exists. We can learn more about Him and His character through these things... how He lovingly cares for all plants and animals..and they were each made SO beautiful- we can know that He will take care of us, as well. :) And even in studying these things in the academic sense, in Science- we have KNOWLEDGE right there in our hands, that God exists..I can't even imagine rejecting God if you know the complexities of nature..
Here's the verse (it's a popular one, but seeing it differently ONLY b/c of the word "knowledge"..WOW!):
"The heaven's declare the glory of God; the skies proclaim the work of his hands. Day after day they pour forth speech; night after night they display knowledge." -Psalm 19:1-2
Anyways, I think maybe you're right- that knowledge is a starting point for faith, but I think that ultimately, your HEART is what makes you believe. :) B/c these scientists, with all their knowledge, have everything it takes to believe, but they don't have the faith in their hearts. :) So, you're right that it's a combination of heart, soul and mind. :)
Well, love ya, ttyl!
~Audrey
Mina has spoken some wisdom into my heart..and made me see things in a new light. :) I always just saw my acceptance of Christ as a heart-action, and never really saw how knowledge was a part of it. I mean, it doesn't seem very logical to believe in God, and a human being sent down from Heaven to be God's son. I mean, all of these things aren't very logical to me. But, I think what I have come to find, is that- you definitely CAN have knowledge as part of the faith journey. Knowledge that this beautiful world around you was created, miraculously, by a flawless being. Yes, we humans can really screw things up, but ultimately, everything keeps flowing and cycling on. The world doesn't end just because we screw up. People die, wars happen, and we are destructive and violent and sinful, but God keeps this world going and going, and He helps restore everything and brings peace to our hearts, after all this horrible stuff. We are able to come to Him humbly, and thank Him for everything- even the pain and suffering, because ultimately, these horrible things only bring us closer to Him. They make us turn to Him, and weep at His feet, and pray He will heal us. There will be healing rivers in Heaven..Eden will be restored. Here is the verse I recently read:
Revelation 22:1-5
Eden Restored
1 Then the angel showed me the river of the water of life, as clear as crystal, flowing from the throne of God and of the Lamb 2 down the middle of the great street of the city. On each side of the river stood the tree of life, bearing twelve crops of fruit, yielding its fruit every month. And the leaves of the tree are for the healing of the nations. 3 No longer will there be any curse. The throne of God and of the Lamb will be in the city, and his servants will serve him. 4 They will see his face, and his name will be on their foreheads. 5 There will be no more night. They will not need the light of a lamp or the light of the sun, for the Lord God will give them light. And they will reign for ever and ever.
I love this verse!
Well, off I go to get some work done! :) I'll try to start blogging again..gradually..haha! :) Have a good one~
Friday, February 18, 2011
Don't love your life too much..
"One or Two Things" by Mary Oliver
Don’t bother me.
I’ve just
been born.
The butterfly’s loping flight
carries it through the country of the leaves
delicately, and well enough to get it
where it wants to go, wherever that is, stopping
here and there to fuzzle the damp throats
of flowers and the black mud; up
and down it swings, frenzied and aimless; and sometimes
for long delicious moments it is perfectly
lazy, riding motionless in the breeze on the soft stalk
of some ordinary flower.
The god of dirt
came up to me many times and said
so many wise and delectable things, I lay
on the grass listening
to his dog voice,
crow voice,
frog voice; now, he said, and now,
and never once mentioned forever,
which has nevertheless always been,
like a sharp iron hoof,
at the center of my mind.
One or two things are all you need
to travel over the blue pond, over the deep
roughage of the trees and through the stiff
flowers of lightening – some deep
memory of pleasure, some cutting
knowledge of pain.
But to lift the hoof!
For that you need
an idea.
For years and years I struggled
just to love my life. And then
the butterfly rose, weightless, in the wind.
“Don’t love your life
too much,” it said,
and vanished
into the world.
Don’t bother me.
I’ve just
been born.
The butterfly’s loping flight
carries it through the country of the leaves
delicately, and well enough to get it
where it wants to go, wherever that is, stopping
here and there to fuzzle the damp throats
of flowers and the black mud; up
and down it swings, frenzied and aimless; and sometimes
for long delicious moments it is perfectly
lazy, riding motionless in the breeze on the soft stalk
of some ordinary flower.
The god of dirt
came up to me many times and said
so many wise and delectable things, I lay
on the grass listening
to his dog voice,
crow voice,
frog voice; now, he said, and now,
and never once mentioned forever,
which has nevertheless always been,
like a sharp iron hoof,
at the center of my mind.
One or two things are all you need
to travel over the blue pond, over the deep
roughage of the trees and through the stiff
flowers of lightening – some deep
memory of pleasure, some cutting
knowledge of pain.
But to lift the hoof!
For that you need
an idea.
For years and years I struggled
just to love my life. And then
the butterfly rose, weightless, in the wind.
“Don’t love your life
too much,” it said,
and vanished
into the world.
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